Local hopes to become first Shotton man to get a suntan

 

A local is hoping to make history this weekend by becoming the first man from Shotton to get a suntan.

82-year-old John Edwards will begin his attempt at around 1.30 this afternoon, the moment the sun reaches over the roof of his bungalow and into the garden.

Wife of 40 years, Dawn, said: “He’s always been ambitious, but this could be one goal too far. Nobody from Shotton gets a suntan. That’s like a man from Miami getting frostbite. But even so, I’m on hand with some margarine and tin foil.”

Local bookie Richard Hayes has been busy taking bets on John’s outrageous attempt, but says the odds aren’t great. “He’s currently at 1/9 to succeed, so it’s not likely”, he explained.

“What’s more likely is he’ll get smashed on flavoured cider, fall asleep and wake up looking like a burnt tomato before launching a sunstroke-fuelled attack on Dawn.”