Parking like an absolute bell-end is ‘far worse’ than being stuck in a car with someone smoking a fag, Welsh motorists have agreed today. The comments follow last week’s welcomed decision to ban smoking in cars carrying minors anywhere in Wales.

Motorist Mike Jones from Aberystwyth said: “I absolutely agree with the in-car smoking ban, it makes sense. But if I had to choose between getting locked in a car with someone smoking twenty Benson & Hedges with the windows rolled up, or sitting next to someone who straddles two parking bays in Tesco for no fucking reason, I’d opt for the secondhand smoke any day of the week”.

The ban, widely accepted, was announced in Wales after it was unanimously agreed that exposing children to secondhand smoke in a confined space was ‘an act of cruelty’, and severely increases their risk of future health problems.

Mike added: “What about my risk of severe health problems when I can’t find a parking space at ASDA because some shitter decides to diagonally park across four bays in his stupid BMW? I get serious rage headaches, and that can’t be good for my long term health.

“Ban them. Ban them all”.